Modern Socks

"The Library's Cat" - 12 x 16" colored pencil on board.
Very nearly finished . . .
Click here to visit my eBay store to find other cat art prints.

"The Dogs of Lost Acres" - 12 x 16" colored pencil on board.
Work in progress - very early stages.
Copyright 2007 Maggie Stiefvater

I'm getting a little irritated with the progressive attitude of my socks. Recently they've decided that, as socks of the 21st century, they don't need to have "an other half" to feel complete. Who says you need another sock to make your existence complete? My socks are doing just fine on their own. Moreover, each of my socks is unique, like a snowflake. Just when I think I can grab two and force them into unholy matrimony, I notice that Sock A has a yellow band and Sock B has taller ribbing. In the words of Homer, D'oh.

I'm not sure what to do about this. I steal my husband's socks sometimes. His socks don't have the strong individual identities of mine: they're all clones of each other. I can grab any two and be pretty sure they'll be perfect for each other. None of the conflicts inherent in rummaging in my own sock drawer.

ME: Sock, you're going with this sock.
SOCK: I don't date taller socks.
ME: How about this one?
SOCK (witheringly): It's not even the same color as me.
ME: Racist.
SOCK: That's just fashion-sense, stupid. Keep lookin'.

In fact, a lot of my articles of clothing are starting to vanish, especially undergarments. I know it's that time of year. The elves, still operating strongly under orders from parental figures, sneak into people's houses and steal socks and underwear so that you'll be more grateful when you receive new ones as Christmas gifts a few months later.

Don't think I'm not onto you guys.